Love and Loss

Today is the service of an old friend. Actually an old Love. One I hadn’t seen a long time, and hadn’t actually hung out with for even longer. Love and loss are funny like that, they bring people and things into your life very unexpectedly.

I found out recently my ex-boyfriend Adam passed away. He wasn’t my last ex before getting married. And he wasn’t my first technical boyfriend, but he was my first love. He was my high school sweetheart if you will..

We started dating in 2001. He was my first “real” boyfriend, (you know that lasted more than a couple weeks) and we were together until 2008. He was a huge part of my life for a very long time. I experienced several things for the first time, good and bad, with him and our group of friends; who I am still friends with a few of to this day. In fact if it wasn’t for my relationship with Adam I never would have met my husband Ben. I have so many memories of hanging out in the cafeteria in the high school, just BS-ing about whatever it is high school kids talk about, friends, cars, drugs, sex, dating, teachers… who knows.

That’s where this was taken.

He took me to my first Homecoming dance.

We would spend almost everyday hanging out in his room after school. Watching anime, listening to music, getting stoned.. being carefree teenagers with nothing to lose. Adam had a huge influence on my music tastes, even to this day, he introduced me to Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin, he helped me discover punk rock like NOFX and the Misfits, Dead Kennedy’s, Dead Milkmen, the list goes on and on..

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His family was always so nice to me. I felt like they were my extra family. I ate dinner there almost every night, and I would be back there as soon as I was allowed to leave the house again the next day. I picked on his siblings like they were my own, but also made sure Adam wasn’t too mean to them. I practically lived there, but his parents never complained. They always treated me like I was one of their own and for that I will forever be grateful.

We used to spend weekends camping and fishing at his family’s place on William’s lake. I’m not sure I ever actually caught a fish up there, but it is some times in my life I will never forget. We’d swim and fish and hike around in the woods looking for places to hangout. We’d drive around and explore the area and have so much fun going on “adventures to do stuff and things”.

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He was my first roommate, him and I and moved into a townhouse apartment with our friend Darrell. All of our friends hung out there, we drank, we partied, got into trouble, it’s times of my life I will never forget!img_20161129_0011img_20161129_0002

Then we moved into a trailer house together, which again are memories I will forever cherish. OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

I’m having a hard time finding the right words to express my feelings today.

Adam,

You were such a huge part of my life for a very long time. You had an effect and influence on who I am to this very day. You were my first boyfriend, my first love, my first dance, my first roommate, my first adult relationship,  my first heartbreak,  more firsts and more memories than I can even begin to try to write down. Though we didn’t always see eye to eye and things didn’t end the way we thought they would, you were and will forever be a very important part of my life. You were always so unique. You marched to beat of your own drum since the day we met. You were kind and funny. You loved animals.You brought Buddy home one day from work cuz someone had found him and no one was claiming him. The people that found him were calling him Prince Charming, but you decided his name was going to be Buddy because you had the song “My Name Is Bud” by NOFX stuck in your head that day. We had so many fun times together. I am sorry I never got to say goodbye.  You always had a huge heart, a beautiful soul and you will be greatly missed on this earth by many many people.

Peace Adam.

Love Jenny

My heart is breaking for his family today and the last several days, and in the days to come, no one should ever have to plan their child’s funeral. I wish there was something I could do to help ease their pain. I am so incredibly sorry that they are having to go through all of this.

Mitch, Kelly, Bronson, and Cortney you have always been like extra family to me. You have all been in my thoughts and prayers daily since I heard about Adam. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I will continue to pray for your family, and I am sending all the love I have your way today and in the days to come.

Since I can’t seem to find the right words here are some pictures of our memories together and times I will forever cherish.

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Rest In Peace Adam. You will be greatly missed!

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